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one of the signs of the apocalypse…

well I’ll be damned!?!? Channel 11 news just had a story on about a car/bike accident (14 year old boy vs. moving Ford Explorer). They had an interview with the the man who heard the crash, called 911 and tended to the boy who was hit. Now here’s the kicker. The man was black… and intelligent! The news actually interviewed a well spoken intelligent black man about a random happening on the street. He didn’t have a a jeri curl. He didn’t say “let me ax you dis!” He didn’t give a shout out to his cousin June Bug. All he did was intelligently and understandably explain the situation.

Suddenly, in this moment, I am proud to be a negro…

Now you know later on in the broadcast some ignant ass nigra is gonna come on to do an editorial about the war and say we should “send da Crips over to find Sadhim Hussein and bus’a cap in hs Al Kidy ass! Fushizzle!”

om

59 comments for “one of the signs of the apocalypse…

  1. July 29, 2003 at 8:19 pm

    Sometimes The Man slips up.

    1. mav
      July 29, 2003 at 8:28 pm

      yeah… I bet some white producer is being flogged by his superiors right this instant…. and they’ve probably snatched the poor black man off the street and are running product and activator through his hair right now so they can rerun the story tomorrow…

    2. July 30, 2003 at 12:52 am

      Oh. Duh. No slip-up. The Urban League convention is downtown this week.

      1. mav
        July 30, 2003 at 3:24 am

        ah… so you think this is The Man “throwing us a friggin’ bone” so to speak?

        1. July 30, 2003 at 9:09 am

          Actually, I suspect it was mere coincidence, but the fact that it *made it to the air* was the bone…

          1. mav
            July 30, 2003 at 1:28 pm

            hmmm… maybe they were trying to make up for the Bush speech they hyped for a week only to have it totally bomb when they aired it…

            worth noting though, they did significantly cut snip down the interview with the intelligent black man (to one sentence) when it aired the next morning…

  2. July 29, 2003 at 8:19 pm

    No fucking way….

    I disbelieve!

    1. mav
      July 29, 2003 at 8:30 pm

      dude… seriously, I swear to god… it was there…. I den seen it with my own too eyes!!!

      1. July 29, 2003 at 8:54 pm

        I wonder why they didn’t interview Project Big Mama…I’ve seen her on the news in most big cities. I’ve often wondered how she can afford to travel to all parts of the country and be fortuitous enough to witness all those newsworthy events. Surely you’ve seen her in Pittsburgh?

        1. mav
          July 29, 2003 at 8:58 pm

          yes…. quite often… hence my surprise at seeing them talk to this guy who seemed like he was highly-educated enough to read something more complex than the tv guide…

  3. July 29, 2003 at 8:29 pm

    As you can probably guess, I can’t exactly relate to what you said, but I absolutely appreciate it. I’m often thrilled to hear anyone on the news who doesn’t sound like they failed out of third grade. In my case, it’s totally without relationship to race, creed or origin, but overall.

    I sometimes wonder if the majority of the world is ignant or if they just amazingly find that cross-section every time.

    That song is arguably the best cover ever, by the way.

    1. mav
      July 29, 2003 at 8:34 pm

      yes… the majority of the world is ignant… just saying…

      That song is arguably the best cover ever, by the way.

      I just got it from Jameel today…

      1. July 29, 2003 at 8:39 pm

        Aha. That’s because Jameel++ kicks ass (for the Lord).

        And I’m afraid I must agree with you on the world. I’ve had various jobs that involved protecting the ignant from themselves and it’s only served to reinforce that view in my mind. I was hoping perhaps I was just jaded and pessimistic.

        1. mav
          July 29, 2003 at 8:46 pm

          yeah, I’d like to say that it was my working in service oriented occupations wherein I protect people from themselves that led me to jaded pessimism… but I think maybe I was just born that way….

          1. July 29, 2003 at 8:59 pm

            Totally understood. I think maybe some degree of innate jaded pessimism is necessary to survive in service work. Otherwise, you’d be apt to become depressed or disillusioned. It’s much easier to stay happy when you don’t expect much, honestly. Sad, perhaps, but true.

          2. mav
            July 29, 2003 at 9:04 pm

            yep… and luckily its easy to not expect much when people are pretty much constantly disappointing…

          3. July 29, 2003 at 9:15 pm

            Sad, but I’m afraid I must agree with this on many counts.

      2. July 29, 2003 at 8:40 pm

        And I got it from .

        1. July 30, 2003 at 6:56 pm

          Wow, it really IS good. The chorus is a little cheesy but the rest of it is awesome.

    2. July 30, 2003 at 4:25 am

      My father is fond of saying…

      “You know how stupid the average person is? Remember that 50% of the population is even worse than that.”

      Somehow it doesn’t help.

      1. mav
        July 30, 2003 at 4:34 am

        actually, I think 99% of the world is below that average level and then there are just a few of us who are really smart…

  4. July 29, 2003 at 9:24 pm

    Seeing as how a month or so ago you declared yourself a chinaman (I don’t know how to make links here so you can find it yourself), I believe your surge of pride may be misplaced in this particular instance.

    1. mav
      July 29, 2003 at 9:59 pm

      yeah, I still abide by that, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t feel good about the remaining negor population bettering themselves… any way, “dat enough! you no buy you no stay in store! you go now!”

      1. July 29, 2003 at 10:02 pm

        Last time I bring my amazing technicolor daishiki to this laundry place…

      2. July 30, 2003 at 5:57 am

        Negor sounds like a supervillan.

        “Hahahaha! Foolish caucasians! You cannot hide your women from Negor!”

        1. July 30, 2003 at 11:47 am

          *falls over laughing*

          1. mav
            July 30, 2003 at 12:26 pm

            yeah… so did I…

  5. July 29, 2003 at 9:26 pm

    #2000!

    I am 31337!

    1. mav
      July 29, 2003 at 9:44 pm

      Re: #2000!

      uhh… yeah… you r0xx0r… or something….

  6. July 29, 2003 at 11:28 pm

    What the heck is a “Channel 11 news”? I don’t think my TiVo gets that 😉

    1. mav
      July 30, 2003 at 3:23 am

      Ummm, the 11 oclock news on channel 11? WPXI/NBC. *shrug* my TiVo gets it just fine…

      1. July 30, 2003 at 9:11 am

        Mine seems to get something called “Futurama” at 11pm. 😛

        1. August 1, 2003 at 1:47 pm

          Clearly you need one that can tape 2 shows at once.

          1. August 1, 2003 at 1:58 pm

            I don’t want a dish.

            I could just do the thing where I hook up my spare Series 1 and let the first tell the second when and what to record that some of the TiVo hackers have been talking about.

          2. mav
            August 1, 2003 at 2:03 pm

            I don’t want a dish.

            Heretic!

          3. August 1, 2003 at 2:11 pm

            I should pay more money for less flexibility why?

            If I were single, sure. Because I’m married it’s not as simple as wanting to see 2 things at once, I have 2 VCRs, a TiVo, 2 TVs and a tuner card. Right now every one can record or view one thing, and one VCR,one TV and the TiVo get to compete over the digital cable tuner for things which aren’t analog (which is like 2 channels that I care about)

            For that I pay $50/mo. I have a cable modem, so the cable isn’t going away. Why do I care?

          4. mav
            August 1, 2003 at 7:39 pm

            so the DirectTiVo has 2 tuners so you can record two things at once (while watching a 3rd thing) and it doesn’t matter if it is an analog or digital thing. And last I checked (which was admittedly a while ago) it was cheaper with more channels than cable…

            granted, we also use DSL not a cable modem… so that might make a difference…

  7. July 29, 2003 at 11:54 pm

    Shoot man. Next thing you know those black guys will be learning how to use computers…they be mad uppitty, yo…

    1. mav
      July 30, 2003 at 3:23 am

      Yep… there goes the neighborhood…

  8. July 30, 2003 at 11:12 am

    Fake news is keeping down the black man too… Unless my fuzzy memory is serving me incorrectly, “The Daily Show” has no black anchors, and the black man who seems to get the most coverage is Al Sharpton.

    1. mav
      July 30, 2003 at 12:41 pm

      ahem… are you implying that the good Reverend is funny somehow? I’ll have you know you’re talking about the next president of these United States…

      1. July 30, 2003 at 12:46 pm

        all i’m sayin’ is The Man thinks the idea of a black man running for president is funny. they sure ain’t givin’ him his props.

      2. July 30, 2003 at 12:54 pm
        1. mav
          July 30, 2003 at 1:26 pm

          *falls over laughing*

          ummm… wait… that’s Jameel’s line

      3. July 30, 2003 at 1:02 pm

        The Next Presidency

        Hey Mav, wanna be running mates?

        We’d be a bad joke waiting to happen, it’ll be great.

        1. mav
          July 30, 2003 at 1:10 pm

          Re: The Next Presidency

          I’m actually planning on running in 2012 already. I think I can win on the internet ticket… Sadly, I’ll be a year too young in 2008… damn Constitution…

          Side Note: The Daily Show already pointed out that Liberman and Sharpton running together would be the least electable ticket of all time, even more so than Sitting Bull and Sum Chinese Guy.

          1. July 30, 2003 at 1:39 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            You know, if we ran together on the metrosexual ticket (we can be the “fabulous party”), you KNOW we will get the best media coverage.

          2. mav
            July 30, 2003 at 1:52 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            Nah… all kinds of people run on full fledged gay tickets… we’d need more of a hook than that… of course, the black jew metrosexual internet ticket might just be novel enough…. hmmm…

          3. July 30, 2003 at 2:03 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            Don’t forget Israeli and Immigrant, and of course the long standing American tradition of actors going into politics.

          4. mav
            July 30, 2003 at 3:04 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            well, given the intelligence of the average American, we might want to bury the Israeli thing. Most people will figure that any country in the middle east that starts with an I is undoubtebly filled with towel-head wearing terrorists…

            and since when are you an immigrant? This is also bad… immigrants can’t run for president…

          5. July 30, 2003 at 3:53 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            I think the Israeli thing is good for the homeland defense crowd.

            I am first generation, so I can run. I am almost an immigrant (by a few weeks), I consider myself assembled in the USA with foreign parts.

            We need to market your black, yet a chinaman thing too. We have this whole multicultural thing DOWN.

            I am about ready to announce our candidacy.

          6. mav
            July 30, 2003 at 4:20 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            I am first generation, so I can run. I am almost an immigrant (by a few weeks), I consider myself assembled in the USA with foreign parts.

            What do you mean? The presidency is not like other offices, you are either a by birth citizen of the USA (meaning, born on US soil, or to parents who were already US citizens when you were born) or you weren’t and therefore you can’t be… if you were born outside of US soil and your parents weren’t yet citizens, you can’t run (for president or vice… other offices you can).

            I am about ready to announce our candidacy.

            Well, like I said… I can’t run til 2012… announcing now is inopportune, I’ll burn out… you have to hit the sweet spot so the voters don’t get sick of you before the polls…

          7. July 30, 2003 at 6:49 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            I was born on US soil just after my parents arrived, and therefore born a citizen even though they had to wait.

            Ok, fine, I’ll wait for the official announcement, but we should still form the party now, cause really, parties are what you do best.

          8. July 30, 2003 at 7:00 pm

            Re: The Next Presidency

            Too many penises on your ticket to be truly multimetroculturalflexisexual.

      4. July 30, 2003 at 1:14 pm

        Is this the part where I say Al Sharpton has freaky hair and someone calls me a racist except that he does have freaky hair and we are all reconciled?

        1. mav
          July 30, 2003 at 1:19 pm

          well, his hair is actually much less freaky than it used to be… but yeah…

          1. July 30, 2003 at 1:23 pm

            Oh yeah? I haven’t seen any pictures of him in a while. Maybe he’s undergoing a makeover to make him look more presidential or something.

            Ooh! Makeover!

          2. mav
            July 30, 2003 at 1:24 pm

            that… and I think he just got old and stuff and kinda figured that it was time to move to a hairstyle more befitting the late 80s…

        2. July 30, 2003 at 7:02 pm

          Shee-oot, I done been called a racist for axing someone to say “ask.”

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