ChrisMaverick dotcom

Ladies, is he really that hot?

So I’m watching a rerun of Saturday Night Live. Its hosted by Colin Farell. Pretty much every other joke is about how hot he is.

The other night beststephi and I were watching a Katie Couric special where they were talking about talking to kids about the fact that they’re having sex younger than ever before (a rant I may save for another time). Katie was addressing the fact that the media is constantly bombarding kids with sexual images. The camera panned across a collage of magazine cut outs. Sexy swimsuit covers of Maxim. A sweaty shirtless Brad Pitt. Lingerie models. Usher freaking a girl in a bikini from behind. Madonna and Britney kissing. Huge boobs, legendary abs. And in the middle of it all…

a headshot of Colin Farell. Not in a sexually suggestive pose. Not modeling underware. Not making out with someone. Just a simple headshot. Apparently the NBC News braintrust decided that Colin sitting there smiling from a print ad was so unbarebly sexy that 15 year old girls are immediatly hypnotized into performing felatio on the nearest available penis.

So I’m wondering, is he really that hot? Seriously, ladies (or gentlemen, I don’t judge). I mean, I’ll even acknowledge that he’s an attractive guy. But is he such the be all end all of sexuality that you swoon into such an uncontollable tizzy just at his smile? Does his smile really compare to Brad Pitts entire naked torso? If so, why? If not, is there someone who does? I rewound and watched the collage a couple times, and he’s the only headshot there. There’s not a single female one, there’s no other male one. There are a lot of hot girls out there, but I can’t think of a single one who would turn me on simply with a picture of their face. Am I wrong guys? I mean, I know the line is supposed to be that a woman’s eyes are her sexiest feature or something like that, but really, be honest. If we’re talking about a simple picture that’s intended to titilate. Well, there should be tits in it, right? Guys like a nice rack. I’d think that something would be similar for the females as well. But I have a hard time thinking that the be all end all of sexuality starts at Colin Farrell’s neck and goes up.

Honestly, when I see him I just think, “that there is a walking infection of herpes.”

*shrug* anyone want to help me out here?

EDIT: Also, is there really anyone out there at all who gets excited by the beginning of the Arena Football season?

om

67 comments for “Ladies, is he really that hot?

  1. January 29, 2005 at 10:15 pm

    Oh Gawd…. I think I’m gonna need a tissue.

    Is it me or did someone just mention “Arena Football”?

    1. mav
      January 29, 2005 at 10:22 pm

      Re: Oh Gawd…. I think I’m gonna need a tissue.

      yeah… ummm… eww…

  2. January 29, 2005 at 10:20 pm

    Given that it was NBC, it was probably shameless cross-promotion for Colin being on SNL. I just finished watching SNL. Colin’s got a nice accent, but he’s not in the same league as a shirtless Brad Pitt (especially, a la Fight Club).

    1. mav
      January 29, 2005 at 10:23 pm

      if it was, it was really subtle. Really, I don’t think it was though. Everyone is constantly going on about how hot he is. He gets a lot of hollywood tail too. He’s probably more famous for that than he is for being an actor.

  3. January 29, 2005 at 11:51 pm

    While Colin doesn’t do it for me, I will admit that certain faces/personalities/smiles do, equally as much as I imagine a nice rack would for most guys. Ewan McGreggor comes to mind, and (somewhat younger) Sean Connery when I’m in that mood. Cuz, you know, guy’s bodies just arn’t that attractive. You got to go for the personalities, smiles and accents, it’s about you’ve got going for you. 😉

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 6:10 am

      yeah, I mean I see your point. But it just struck me as odd that he was the only one. There were other men in the collage, mostly shirtless, but he was the only one that was just a head shot.

      1. January 30, 2005 at 11:16 am

        I’m sure there was a marketing survey performed somewhere in there 🙂

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 12:10 pm

          where do I get that job? I want to be the guy who hangs out at the mall for dateline and gets to ask random 16 year old girls. Does this picture make you horny?

  4. January 29, 2005 at 11:56 pm

    yes. yes he is.

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 6:11 am

      Thank you.

      And then the image became too much for her, and she went off to find a 15 year old boy to make a man.

      1. January 30, 2005 at 10:24 am

        on that note, and this could probably be a rant of my own, but I don’t understand the appeal of “making a boy a man”. There’s no bragging rights to that; all you get is a really inexperienced boy.

        I’m off to find Colin Farrel.

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 12:05 pm

          well, the appeal is more for the boy, I think. For the girl, well I guess there is the fact that you’re relatively assured he’s disease free. Plus there’s probably something of an ego shot that goes with the fact that you’re the first, and that he’ll remember you fondly forever. Of course I don’t know if that’s really true. But I expect girls believe it is.

          Dennis Miller made a similar comment about the attraction men have to virgins. He said that the Muslim terrorists who blew up the WTC believed that they’d have a reward of 30 virgins in the afterlife. But he felt that was stupid. It might be nice for the novelty of deflowering the first couple, but after that you’re going to want a pro.

          1. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 12:08 pm

            also, for the love of Jay-Z, use a condom… we don’t want you catching his chlymidia.

          2. January 30, 2005 at 3:00 pm

            there’s probably something of an ego shot that goes with the fact that you’re the first, and that he’ll remember you fondly forever

            Who cares? When you’re “in the moment” you just want to be sure you get yours! Take it from a, ahem, mature woman, this is no time to hold school. There’s enough work to do without worrying about lessons.

          3. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 3:04 pm

            well, I think that was Dennis Miller’s point. The virgin thing only sounds good on paper.

  5. January 30, 2005 at 12:07 am

    he’s no davey jones, but he is kinda dreamy in a bad boy kinda way.

    1. January 30, 2005 at 12:14 am

      That’s exactly right. He’s cute, but the appeal is in the Bad Boy persona. The girls know that he has that rep, so all they need is to see his face. They know the rest.

      1. mav
        January 30, 2005 at 6:17 am

        actually, most of the teens said that the sexual images in the media don’t affect them at all. They’re completely desesnitized to it. The Dateline (or 48 hours, or whatever show it was) experts seemed to more or less agree. The only one that thought it was shocking was this the one very religious girl (there were 20 kids) who thought that sex was sacred and generally intentionally shields herself from popular media for fear of being corrupted by it. But then Katie Couric made her look at Colin and she immediately contracted gonnorhea.

        Ok, the very last sentence might have been a lie. Everything up to there was true.

        1. January 30, 2005 at 7:14 am

          Um, someone claiming that an image doesn’t affect them isn’t actually evidence that it doesn’t. People are notoriously unreliable about that sort of thing. Besides, “desensitized” could mean, “well, yeah, I assume everyone is just getting it on 24/7. Where’s my 15 year old boy?”

          1. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 7:59 am

            Um, someone claiming that an image doesn’t affect them isn’t actually evidence that it doesn’t. People are notoriously unreliable about that sort of thing.

            oh, absolutely. I’m simplifying a bit. Anyway, Dateline’s experts also pointed out that the “media makes kids want to have sex” angle is a bit overplayed. They even pointed out that teen sex is actually down the last couple years, its just that teen sexual awareness is up. At least according to their studies, which I found suspect for other reasons.

            The point I was trying to make was that the assumption was “little girls and little boys are turned on by naughty pictures, and pics of dirty looking irish man-sluts” and the kids were kinda saying, “Nah, not really… doesn’t do much for me. Now hooking up on the dancefloor, that’s something else.”

            If you really want a 15 year old boy, I’m sure we can find one for you.

    2. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 6:12 am

      Uh huh…. ooh, look at that guy over there. No not the one with the big muscles, the one that looks like he probably has the clap. Yeah, he’s hot.

      1. January 30, 2005 at 3:38 pm

        cuz lord knows you can tell the guy with the big muscles doesn’t have the clap by looking at him…

        Admittedly, farrell looks a bit scuzzy in that picture…its a really bad picture.

        His appeal lies in the fact that he defies the typical hollywood pretty boy image *cough*Depp*cough!*, more closely resembling your typical irish blue-collar shlub down at the local pub who just happens to make seven figures a film (I’m guessing…)

        …hell, if I made seven figures for 3 months of work, I’d be a big man skank and make sure everybody knew about too…

        “… it’s not his physical attractiveness that make him sexy, its his confidence and ‘devil-may-care’ attitude.” Chicks dig the confidence*…

        *…as long as you’re confident about something positive and/or productive, apparently…

  6. January 30, 2005 at 12:54 am

    EDIT: Also, is there really anyone out there at all who gets excited by the beginning of the Arena Football season?

    I would, if we still had the Gladiators. Arena Football rocks.

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 6:18 am

      well sure, but you’re a freak. If they had a woman’s field hockey team that wore black and gold you’d root for them.

      1. January 30, 2005 at 10:26 am

        The Gladiators didn’t wear black and gold, they wore green and khaki. It was a pretty snazzy look, but maybe it’s what doomed them. I bet if they’d worn black and gold and called themselves the Mini-Steelers, they’d still be around.

        I thought you of all people would appreciate a game in which punting is illegal, “out of bounds” is a wall, and players must play both offense and defense.

        Ooh, I just had a great idea. Arena Football is an awesome sport, but its flaw is that there’s too much offense. It’s just too hard to stop someone from scoring when they’re never more than one pass away from the end zone. So what would be really cool is if they took the rules from Arena Football, and applied them to a larger field. They could call it “Stadium Arena Football.”

        Maybe the field doesn’t need to be wider, just longer. Which would make it more the shape of a Circus Maximimus. That’d be cool. We don’t have nearly enough sports happening in the Circus Maximus these days. Of course, “Circus Maximus Arena Football” is a bit of a mouthful…

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 12:06 pm

          actually, I do appreciate those aspects of it.And even I am not excited to the extent that the commercial that was on when I wrote that thought I was. You do have an interesting idea about Cirus Maximus Arena Football, though.

          1. January 30, 2005 at 1:59 pm

            Oh, I haven’t seen the commercial. I did watch some Arenaball today though.

            You know what else would be cool in football? Obstacles. Like a fence at the fifty yard line. And big pits around the 20. With tigers in ’em.

            Goddammit, I wanna play football.

          2. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 2:15 pm

            yeah… I watched a few minutes of it, but not much. Maybe after the superbowl is over I’ll start watching more of it.

            I played online football on my PS2 for the first time a little bit ago… ended up getting beat by some 12 year old kid who swears too much… was really close though. Steelers vs. Steelers, and lost 38-34 when I could get Bettis to make a TD or firstdown 4 for and 3 on their 4 yard line with 10 seconds left in the game… *sigh*

          3. January 30, 2005 at 9:24 pm

            I mean I wanna play real football. Like, with a ball, and outside, and stuff.

            Though I do also sorta wanna play some computer football. Hmm. Wonder how hard it’d be to write a football simulator in flash.

            Steelers vs. Steelers, and lost 38-34 when I could get Bettis to make a TD or firstdown 4 for and 3 on their 4 yard line with 10 seconds left in the game… *sigh*

            You shoulda thrown to Hines. Why does no one ever seem to understand that? It’s so damned obvious…

          4. mav
            January 31, 2005 at 10:14 am

            Because we were playing Steelers vs. Steelers, and Hines gets covered by Polomalu. It’s a wash.

  7. January 30, 2005 at 6:09 am

    Eww. Colin Farell looks like archetypical guy at the Mc Donald’s asking ” Do you want fries with that?”

    Sorry, I just don’t see it. Now Kenneth Brannaugh, that’s a sex symbol 😉

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 6:19 am

      So, is Kenneth hot enough that you’d be turned on by just a picture of his face?

  8. January 30, 2005 at 6:36 am

    I watched that snl too… and yeah he’s def as hot as everyone makes him out to be. I don’t think a picture of him would make me run out and have sex w/ someone, but a good-looking face is all a guy really needs. (Nice abs and arms and other stuff is just icing to the cake) And he’s no brad pitt.

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 6:59 am

      thanx for answering. I’m sure is sitting around someone cursing Brad Pitt at this very moment.

      So the question is, I’ll buy your comment that a nice face can be sexy, but can a guy be sexy without a nice face. Some guys will use the term butterface for a girl where she’s not all that pretty but has a killer body, can the same be true for a guy? Will you, as a girl, look at some boy and say “well, he’s ugly, but look at those abs and arms. I’d hit that?”

      1. January 30, 2005 at 2:36 pm

        Well hell! Isn’t that the real purpose of paper bags?

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 2:50 pm

          My Word, mother! I am shocked! Shocked and appalled, I say.

          1. January 30, 2005 at 2:55 pm

            Hey kid, Mama’s need loving too.

          2. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 3:07 pm

            yeah… but really… bag on the head? Next you’ll be advocating GHB.

          3. January 30, 2005 at 3:10 pm

            Don’t knock it. Times can be tough past 50! ummmm I might need to go make a phone call.

          4. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 3:15 pm

            Dear federal agents monitoring these pages through the authority granted by the patriot act,

            Please be advised that ‘s comments are her own and do not represent the feelings of her children, or the owners of Livejournal. Any similarities between characters depicted here and any actual persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

            -Mav

      2. January 30, 2005 at 2:39 pm

        Personally… I don’t think I could be physically attracted to someone if I didn’t like their face. It’s what girls look at the most. For example…. Edge has an nice body…but the face is ugly… and i would not hit that. lol hope i helped ya out.. looks like u got a lot of comments.

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 2:58 pm

          actually, I think that’s the whole point of the butterface theory. It’s when a guy looks at a girl and says she’s too ugly to date seriously but then looks at her body and says “well, I’d still do her, though.”

          yeah… this is a decent amount of comments. But it doesn’t compare to when I got more than 170 by just pointing out that I don’t like bagels.

  9. January 30, 2005 at 7:33 am

    Posting that picture must have been a reference to the fact that he’s a slut (look, kids, boys sleep around too!), and not that he’s that hot. He’s certainly not good-looking enough for the face alone to do it. There’re only a very few guys who can achieve that status, and they have to be making some other face than the lovable-boy-next-door-who’ll-screw-anything pose. Now Gael Garcia Bernal, that’s a different story …

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 8:06 am

      to be fair, they didn’t explicitly make reference to Colin in anyway. I just happened to notice him grinning in the midst of a collage of sweaty glimmering naked flesh, and he stood out to me, because he wasn’t.

      Anyway, so are you saying just that Gael García Bernal is hot and that you’d jump into the sack with him at the first available opportunity, or are you saying that Gael García Bernal is so hot that seeing him makes you want to get laid with anyone half way decent just to quench the insatiable thrist in your loins?

  10. January 30, 2005 at 7:51 am

    nbc news is crazy.

    colin’s hot, but he is hardly driving people into spontanious orgasm with a headshot.

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 8:08 am

      well of course not. If he were, then the kids wouldn’t need to go out and have the sex. They’re just saying that once you see him, then suddenly you need to have the sex. I hear that seeing Colin Farell’s face is the number one reason that 14 year old girls blow R. Kelly and then let him pee on them.

      Ok, I might have made that up too.

  11. January 30, 2005 at 8:16 am

    is he really that hot? … is he such the be all end all of sexuality that you swoon into such an uncontollable tizzy just at his smile? Does his smile really compare to Brad Pitts entire naked torso?

    i read this entire message out loud to my girlfriend, and when i reached the portion i’ve just quoted, she was nodding and saying ‘uh huh” to each of the questions.

    i myself totally don’t get it… but i’ve been informed that his accent is hella sexy, and also allegedly the more you get to know about him the sexier he becomes, because his personality is very sexy (in a just-doesn’t-give-a-shit kind of way, also i guess the bad-boy thing that was mentioned in previous comments, theoretically a mother-complex kind of thing where one may hope to be the one to turn him around or something.)

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 9:59 am

      wacky. Keep your girlfriend away from him. I’d hate to see you end up with syphillis.

      See, that’s the thing. I think Carmen Electra is sexy. I’ve seen pictures of her naked and I think “wow” I’d hit that. Or something along those lines. And yeah, the sex-kitten repuation probably helps that somewhat. But if you’re asking me which of these pictures turns me on more:


       
      Full Body Head Shot

      It’s unquestionably the one on the left. Even though she appears to probably be more naked in the one on the right. The one on the right is a better photograph. She has better makeup. etc. I just don’t think that a simple headshot is all that titilating. The full body shot isn’t the sexiest thing ever either. But, it at least feels a little naughty, whereas the headshot feels like something she’d send in because she’s trying to get an acting gig.

      1. January 31, 2005 at 9:52 am

        well… i tried clicking on those pictures (assuming they’re links to full-sized ones) but i got some kind of spanish not-authorised page on the full body one.

        so i’ll have to judge from the thumbnail versions. in this size, the one on the right is more attractive to me, because there’s more detail. the full body one, i’m like, ok it’s a girl and she’s almost naked and she is nice and shapely, but i see zillions of pictures like this all over the place and it really isn’t anything special. but in the closeup headshot one, you can really tell how attractive this is. not that this has anything to do with your original point, because i’m not getting totally incited to commit sexually-related acts simply by looking at *either* of these pictures…

        1. mav
          January 31, 2005 at 10:05 am

          well… i tried clicking on those pictures (assuming they’re links to full-sized ones) but i got some kind of spanish not-authorised page on the full body one.

          The site is just being funny about letting you click a direct link. Try clicking on it, and then clicking return in the url banner, or cutting and pasting the url directly in: http://bradvei2.webcindario.com/carmen-electra/bradvei-carmen-electra-DTfeb4-04.jpg

          so i’ll have to judge from the thumbnail versions. in this size, the one on the right is more attractive to me, because there’s more detail. the full body one, i’m like, ok it’s a girl and she’s almost naked and she is nice and shapely, but i see zillions of pictures like this all over the place and it really isn’t anything special. but in the closeup headshot one, you can really tell how attractive this is. not that this has anything to do with your original point, because i’m not getting totally incited to commit sexually-related acts simply by looking at *either* of these pictures…

          Actually, that sort of was my original point. I have a hard time believing that the covers of Cosmo, Maxim, US Weekly or even Playboy are enticing kids to run out and have sex immediately. Much less a simple head shot of Colin Farell, man-whore that he is.

    2. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 10:00 am

      sorry about the multiple answers, btw… I screwed up the HTML and was ruining the page. So I had to repost to fix it.

  12. January 30, 2005 at 9:33 am

    Nope

    no colin farrell is not that hot. hello he needs to do something with his eyebrows and what does he think he can just roll out of bed and not shave and every girl will swoon for him? let me tell you sexy med are humprey bogart, carey grant, and sean connery..they are actually reeally men men not ohh look at me men. as for a picture of females to cream over i like a nice rack but in this day and age they all look like mchookers or mcsluts r’us. the women have to use there racks or kiss other girls to get attention. the two females i cream over just to see her face is marlene deitrich or maybe mamie van doren( she just had to lick her lips in front of the camara for 10 minutes and every seat could be wet). so see there are females out there that a head shot could do for any guy its just they have been forgotten because those stars are long gone.

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 10:11 am

      Re: Nope

      eh… see… even with the women you mentioned, I don’t so much get excited by their head shots as their body shots. No matter what she’s doing, with a head shot, I’m much more likely to say how pretty the girl is than how sexy. That may just be me though.

  13. January 30, 2005 at 9:49 am

    I’d hit that.

    Well, unless there was a potbelly and crabs attached to it. Or a nasty attitude. But the smile suggests he’s friendly.

    The full body shots are nice to look at, but I wouldn’t say they turn me on. Neither does the smiling face.

    But I’d still hit that, given the opportunity.

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 10:12 am

      dude… he would so give you crabs…

      oh, and that’s not the exact same head shot they had on TV. I just found a random headshot of his to show my point.

      1. January 30, 2005 at 10:56 am

        Well, then, I’d hit someone who looked like that and didn’t have any groin grossness.

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 12:12 pm

          *ahem*

          1. January 30, 2005 at 1:50 pm

            *ahem*

          2. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 2:16 pm

            oh… does that mean you’re on your way?

          3. January 30, 2005 at 2:50 pm

            Why does it always have to be me? Can’t you men make the effort and come to me, once in a while????

          4. mav
            January 30, 2005 at 3:01 pm

            I really should go out to New York again sometime. I’m always so poor though. And what with the house buying, I dunno when its gonna get better.

  14. January 30, 2005 at 2:45 pm

    EDIT: Also, is there really anyone out there at all who gets excited by the beginning of the Arena Football season?

    Are you kidding? Don’t they wear those tight sexy pants? Of course I’m excited!

    1. mav
      January 30, 2005 at 2:59 pm

      hmmm… you’re quite into this today. Are you drunk?

      1. January 30, 2005 at 3:02 pm

        Not yet! It’s only 3pm, I have to wait until 5 to get started on that. I am civilized after all.

        1. mav
          January 30, 2005 at 3:06 pm

          not the civilized world’s fault that you don’t live in the morally correct time zone.

  15. February 1, 2005 at 4:21 pm

    Nice head shot

    I was going to say I have no idea what girls see in Colin Farell. But that’s a pretty cute head shot! Honestly, though, I don’t find him that attractive. Paul Rudd on the other hand… sigh! So, yes, nice eyes, hair, and smile are required; a guy’s body just has to be not bad.

    Contrary to what the kids on Dateline said, I do think images in the media influence desire. Watching the Young and the Restless as a kid and, later, reading Cosmo influenced me in terms of what I thought was acceptable (despite my parents’ strict rules).

    1. mav
      February 1, 2005 at 9:28 pm

      Re: Nice head shot

      Noooo… another one is turning.

      Yeah, I think obviously kids (and adults) are going to be influenced by culture. But its a feedback. Culture and the media are also reflections of the people. People aren’t just becoming more sexual because there’s sex in the media. There’s sex in the media because people are becoming more sexual. The problem is older generations have a natural inclination to stave all progress and change. Its a survival instinct. Animals fight to maintain the ecology in which they have thrived. So while younger generations attempt to adapt to the changing world around them, older generations will try to maintain their environment as it always was. Of course this is all just conjecture on my part. I wish someone would give me a grant.

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