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on drinking purity…

jameel suggested that I read this drunkard checklist and post it to my LJ with the number that I have completed. I figured some of you might like to start working on these too. sebastiandark and avocado_tom, I am of course looking in your general directions.

So my magic number is 21. Just over half completed. I suppose I could get a couple others if I wanted to start stretching it (I’m a mutt, so I’m sure that getting drunk in Scotland counts as the motherland in some respect… and I’ve never bought a drink for everyone in a crowded bar, but I have rented a room in a bar to throw an open bar party…. things like that) but I decided to play it straight.

So 19 to get through, huh? I have some work to do.

So how many have other people done? I guess if anyone is curious as to where I got any of the points, I guess I can tell the story, just ask.

om

31 comments for “on drinking purity…

  1. January 25, 2006 at 2:05 am

    eh.

    I’m at 19.

    I’m close to at least 5 or 6 others, but don’t quite meet their requirements, specifically:

    1) the drunk tank was full so I made the cops find where I was supposed to be and take me home
    2) I wasn’t sober when i tipped the bartender
    3) the expensive bottle wasn’t apropos of nothing – i always made up an excuse like “I’m visting, so here this is” or “it was your birthday a while ago” or something
    4) I’ve only watched barfly with one or two of my closest friends while getting loaded…or loaded enough that I didn’t remember it so we had to watch it again: does it count if you watch it 5 times with the same friend?)
    5) I decided to not buy the $2000 bottle of 100 year old Port. Yes, it was a moment of weakness.
    6) I’ve never used “fishing trip” as an excuse: instead it’s usually “camping”or “hunting” but often there is a body of water and usually a bonfire

    Sure, you could view the above as “excuses”, or you can just say that the rules need to be updated. Your call.

    1. mav
      January 26, 2006 at 2:06 pm

      heh… and here I was POSITIVE you’d have the drunk tank one.

  2. January 25, 2006 at 2:06 am

    6.5. I counted wrong the first time.

    1. mav
      January 25, 2006 at 2:27 pm

      how many did you count the first time?

      1. January 25, 2006 at 2:32 pm

        4.5

        The 0.5 is from the time I drank 3/4 of a fifth of Old Granddad at a party.

        1. mav
          January 25, 2006 at 2:34 pm

          so shouldn’t it be 4.75?

  3. January 25, 2006 at 2:33 am

    1

    I have a loooong way to go.

    1. mav
      January 25, 2006 at 2:33 pm

      really? only one? Which one?

  4. January 25, 2006 at 2:38 am

    I read the list and came up with 17. And the fact that Im on the 90 day countdown to my 40th birthday, Im looking at this as some sort of a manifesto.

    Do you think you get bonus points for getting drunk with your mom instead of your dad?

    1. mav
      January 25, 2006 at 5:04 pm

      I dunno about bonus points. I have drank with my dad but I’m a million times more likely to drink with my mom. I guess it just depends on the relationship.

      1. January 27, 2006 at 3:41 am

        Thank you Son. Anytime I win over the Ex is to be celebrated. BTW, I score a 19. I’m not telling which numbers, but guess what’s in the coffee cup.

        1. mav
          January 27, 2006 at 2:50 pm

          Heh… well at least the readers now know where I get it from…

  5. January 25, 2006 at 2:49 am

    I’ve got 9 so far.

    And is one of the people in the pic pouring from a bottle of Laser? (That red and yellow-on-black label disturbs me to this day.)

    1. mav
      January 25, 2006 at 5:02 pm

      all of us are… that was the 40 of choice at that particular party.

  6. January 25, 2006 at 2:49 am

    I feel like a drunk now

    29, with only mild stretching of the truth.

    2,3,4,5*,8,9,10*,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19,20,
    21,22*,23,24,25,27,28,30*,31,33,34*,36,39

    5: They didn’t take me to the drunk take, but I was forcibly taken by the police to the hospital and wasn’t allowed to leave until morning after I wrecked my car drunk and got my DUI.

    10: I was somewhat drunk, but I gave a $25 tip on a free drink in Vegas.

    22: I’ve never counted, but we did make as many drinks as we could out of the Bartender’s Bible in college (most of which were nasty).

    30: We didn’t even bother to use the fishing story, but I did get drunk at my lake house, bonfire and all.

    34: It was more than half a paycheck, but it was from my summer job in college. I was working more than 30 hours per week, so I count it.

    1. January 25, 2006 at 4:12 am

      Re: I feel like a drunk now

      I knew there was a reason I married you. 🙂

      I only got 16. That’s still higher than I thought, considering I’ve never finished an entire bottle of liquor.

      1. mav
        January 26, 2006 at 2:34 pm

        Re: I feel like a drunk now

        I knew there was a reason I married you. 🙂

        Because you were drunk?

        Or I guess you’re saying you married him because he was drunk. There’s got to be a date rape clause about that somewhere.

        1. January 26, 2006 at 3:53 pm

          Re: I feel like a drunk now

          Well, after I got dressed for my wedding, my mom handed me a shot of tequila that we did together.

          At the ceremony, Jeff made me drink some scotch out of this little fancy Scottish mug thingy.

          So yeah, I was pretty well drunk the whole time.

          1. mav
            January 26, 2006 at 4:30 pm

            Re: I feel like a drunk now

            wow… and he still married you? Most guys would have just taken you home, screwed you and not called in the morning. You’re so lucky. What a keeper!

    2. mav
      January 26, 2006 at 2:28 pm

      Re: I feel like a drunk now

      5) Hmmm… I’m not sure… seems like being locked up is really a big part of it to me. I mean, if you were in a bad car wreck and just hurt really bad, they might make you stay overnight at the hospital too, right? I think the real reason I feel like you have to be in the tank is because in the hospital you’re surrounded by nurses and sick people. In the drunk tank you’re surrounded by… well… other drunks.

      10) See, that one I’d count. And you beat me. The most I’ve ever given was a $20 tip on a free drink in Vegas. Vegas is special though. If you’re doing well (which I was) you’re just kinda expected to tip extravagantly. Or was the cocktail waitress just really hot?

      34) Hmmm, I wasn’t thinking of college jobs. But even then, I certainly never spent half of my check on one bottle. I liked being an efficient drunk.

  7. January 25, 2006 at 2:55 am

    16

    I think I’m past the days where I want to do any of the others, except for 6. And since he’s not dead yet, it’ll have to wait.

    1. mav
      January 26, 2006 at 2:35 pm

      Come on… be a go getter kill him and get it done…

      Well, you know… unless its me.

  8. January 25, 2006 at 4:22 am

    15

  9. Anonymous
    January 25, 2006 at 1:51 pm

    I’m at 3.

    3, 32, 36. I’ve leaned on friends to walk home after drinking. I can sing a drinking song or 3. And I’ve enjoyed absinthe.

    I’m clearly far behind on embracing my inner alcoholic.

  10. January 25, 2006 at 2:10 pm

    I know you got some Indian in you. Just sayin’….

    1. mav
      January 25, 2006 at 2:25 pm

      you know… originally I thought you were going for a totally separate (and much more gay) joke… “You got a little indian in you?”

  11. January 25, 2006 at 8:12 pm

    Umm, 4.

    This list really isn’t geared toward the introspective, quiet drunks.

    1. January 25, 2006 at 8:14 pm

      Although re-reading the “100 different drinks one”, if they count different beers and wines, I probably get that one as well.

      I wasn’t going to try to count the number of mixed drinks I’ve had/invented, but it’s probably a bit less than 100.

      1. mav
        January 25, 2006 at 8:50 pm

        yeah, that one was easy. I spent a little over a year trying every beer on the Mad Mex McKnight Road menu a while back. If I remember correctly, that was like 75 or 80 at the time. So starting there, it’s pretty easy to find another 20+ mixed drinks, wines, shots, etc.

  12. January 25, 2006 at 9:43 pm

    Nine, +/- a couple: 4,8,14,16 (I should get 2 points for getting drunk with both parents),18 (Yeungling),22 (pretty sure…),23,24 (If you count going to a bar, having a few and coming back to work),36. #40 sounds like fun, and I wonder if you could pull this off by hitting the communion wine enough times…

    1. mav
      January 26, 2006 at 2:05 pm

      You don’t get a point for each parent. I didn’t count it twice, you don’t get to either. 🙂

      And I don’t think the going to a bar and going back to work counts. 1) Lots of people go out for drinks at lunch. 2) I think a big part of the point of that one is sneaking the drinks at your desk while no one is looking. (or working in a place so slackful that no one cared).

      I didn’t think you’d be over 100 drinks. But hey, I can’t say you aren’t either. 🙂

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