ChrisMaverick dotcom

on powerball winnings…


POWERBALL!!!
The REAL Powerball

So ever since the Powerball hit huge numbers, they’ve been running this Powerball pool at work. Five dollars to enter with the understanding was that when we won, we’d split the whole $170some-odd-million(we’d take the cash payout) between all the people who chipped chipped in. I decided I couldn’t pass that up. Even splitting the cash between the 55 people who were in the pool, I figured the $3+million would be a nice little take.

So anyway, somehow we magically seemed to NOT win the Powerball. I really hadn’t considered that as a possibility. I’m quite sure I could sue over it or something, but I’m all nice and stuff, so I’m willing to let it slide.

That said, we did win $67 in the Powerball. Kickass! One dollar and twenty-two cents! CASH MONEY!!! Score! Oh the things I could do with that. I was all excited. Except this morning, I come into work and what do I find? A mountain of bagels sitting on the table in the office kitchen with a sign that says “For Powerball Players.”

WHAT THE FUCK!?!

Exactly why was it decided that our winnings were to be spent on nasty tasting stale bread. Aren’t my feelings on bagels well known?

Dammit! What a waste.

That’s why they shouldn’t let you white people handle money. Might as well have bought magic beans.

Two points to whoever understands the image associated with this entry.

om

24 comments for “on powerball winnings…

  1. February 22, 2006 at 9:06 pm

    Dear god, that was possibly my favorite pinball table, ever (up there with Medieval Madness, Revenge from Mars, Lord of the Rings, and Bride of Pinbot, which is only there because it was the first table I played and did anywhere near well on).

    I’m not even entirely sure why it was, except for the great, eclectic feel of it all. Shame you can never find a non-broken version anymore.

    1. mav
      February 22, 2006 at 9:22 pm

      anybody who really knows me should know that Bride of Pinbot has a very special place in my heart. I actually published a short story about Bride. I don’t think I have it online. I’ll definitely be needing to recitfy that as soon as possible. Did you ever read it?

      TZ is one of my favorite machines. Definitely up there with Bride, and the newest version of Playboy. I also like Star Trek:TNG. Really, I’m just a huge pinball fan. I used to have a TZ in my living room. Had to sell it to fix my car when I fried my engine several years ago. One of the hardest decisions in my life. Definitely one of the things I’d be replacing as soon as I do win the Powerball.

      1. February 22, 2006 at 10:47 pm

        Hrm. Never read that one. This may have to be rectified, although my reading list is rather full at the moment.

        Then again, a Twilight Zone pinball table seems like the perfect setup for, well, a Twilight Zone story.

        1. mav
          February 22, 2006 at 11:52 pm

          and now for the first time, on the web, ONE

      2. February 23, 2006 at 5:04 am

        Will you ever forgive me for then selling it? I haven’t forgiven myself. I so wish I still had it. Perversely, getting another TZ is just about the one thing Deb’s ever given me resistance on… I don’t understand it. She even liked the game.

        1. mav
          February 23, 2006 at 6:21 am

          Dude… I don’t even forgive myself for selling it to you in the first place. If I were a stronger man, I simply should have dealt with not eating for 3 months or something….

  2. February 22, 2006 at 9:07 pm

    Quick! Shoot it up the right Spiral! (“It’s not yours!”)

    1. mav
      February 22, 2006 at 9:26 pm

      Dammit! It is mine! Well, it was. See my response to Fred. I really need to fix that. Someone lend me $3000.

      1. February 22, 2006 at 10:01 pm

        It is mine. (Sorry, no good pictures.)

        1. mav
          February 22, 2006 at 11:40 pm

          so uh… what’s your address… not that I am gonna break in and steal it or anything…

          ummm… when are you going to be out?

          1. February 22, 2006 at 11:46 pm

            I wouldn’t insult you by giving you my address. Certainly, you can find it. However, bring help. You’ll have to restrain three attack cats and get the other pinball machine out of the way.

          2. mav
            February 22, 2006 at 11:52 pm

            what’s the other machine? you know… not that I’d want to steal it too or anything like that.

          3. February 22, 2006 at 11:55 pm

            The other machine is High Speed. The other two are in the garage. The rest are detailed on my ugly arcade page.

          4. mav
            February 23, 2006 at 12:01 am

            *sigh* don’t go inspiring me to get into another money sinking habit. No matter how much I really want to.

  3. February 22, 2006 at 9:43 pm

    Ah now that game brings back fond memories of CMU. 🙂

    1. mav
      February 22, 2006 at 9:49 pm

      heh… brings back fond memories of my living room for me… Damn, I need to get a new one.

  4. February 22, 2006 at 10:15 pm

    Do I not count as white people if I would’ve divvied up the loot?

    You cow-orkers are dicks.

    1. mav
      February 22, 2006 at 11:44 pm

      nah… you don’t count as white because you’re a nigger…

      well, ok, according to that picture, you’re apparently a hulk…

      1. February 23, 2006 at 3:04 pm

        Well, Mr. Cultural Studies, you should know that the hulk represents the Other that resides within each of us. Not the id, but the bit of us that’s not socially acceptable, yet powerful. Just as every cowboy has a lady inside him, every white devil has a powerful, independent brutha inside. THe Man operates through Society to keep that inner black man in check – hoodwinking otherwise reasonable white folks into denying their true nature. We all come from the mother land of Africa – black power resides inside us all. But The Man is afraid of that power. Afraid that if the masses recognize, they will throw off their oppressors. So the twist our culture to suppress that inner “hulk” keeping whitey in check, docile and eating his bagels. Chuck D had it wrong — it takes a nation of millions to hold itself back!

        1. mav
          February 23, 2006 at 4:04 pm

          As-Salaam-Alaikum, my brotha’.

  5. February 22, 2006 at 10:27 pm

    Never trust whitey.

    1. mav
      February 22, 2006 at 11:51 pm

      Power to the people

  6. February 22, 2006 at 11:10 pm

    Woo-hoo, two points!

    And as a white person, I can assure you I would not have spent lottery winnings on bagels.

    1. mav
      February 22, 2006 at 11:54 pm

      good, after the revolution we shall let you live. If you’re lucky, we might even let you be a “house cracker.”

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