I now take a pause from my regularly scheduled term paper writing to give you this brief one act play. Enjoy:
Our scene opens at the door way to the Pittsburgh home of Stephanie Siler and Christopher Maverick. Both are working because they’re grownups and life sucks and you have shit to do on weekends sometimes. Outside at play in the street are a horde of young neighbor children, clearly possessed by the demon spawn of Faust and Cassandra. Eventually the ruckus becomes too much for our heroic couple to deal with, and Stephanie looks out of her window to see the children have decided to take their games into the yard of the hardworking couple. Steph goes to the front door and yells from the porch.
Steph (to kids outside): Can you please not play in our yard?
Kid: Uhh… we didn’t know this was your yard!
Steph: Well… it is! Get off of it.
Steph (coming back in and talking to Mav): Do you think it’s horrible of us to yell at kids on our lawn?
Mav: Fuck no!!! It’s been my dream of being old enough to do that since I was their age!
Fin!
Bravo! Author! Author! I love this play.
thank you!
hmmm, all you proved is that you are now a grumpy OLD man
I yell at random kids all the time in my neighborhood. I’ve become “the mean lady” on the block.
They need people like us. Helps them learn self-control.
What lack of education and understanding. they didn’t know it was “your yard” like it could have been mistaken for thiers
They’re demon spawn! Weren’t you paying attention? They speak nothing but lies!
Are you calling my son a liar!? You racist! You must be a Mexican!
The only Spawn I know is Michael Jai White, and he is a judo kick of awesome
Stephanie: That’s an actual quote from a neighbor, right?
Yup. We could write so many plays!
*I* do. I’m waiting to hear from the Tony people on my telemarketing scam series any day now.
a license to print money from your door step
Please tell me you read r/childfree! Cause I sure as hell do!
nope. I never got into reddit
I think this one act play deserves a spot there.
I don’t even actually know how it works
Bonus points if your wearing a robe and a wifebeater.
jeans and a hoodie… pretty standard for my “sitting at home and writing uniform.” (they’re lucky I’m wearing pants)
Clearly, growing up deserves SOME kind of perks!
What the hell does being Mexican have to do with being racist? Did you neighbor really say that stupid shit? Smh
Do not underestimate the dumbness of our neighbors.