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Tag: chiaroscuro

6-30-08

6-30-08

Day 689 of 365 More.

You know, looking at this makes it seem a lot more depressing than I thought I felt at the time.

I actually had a few really good ideas the last couple days. I was really happy with them. It was a good three or four day run. And I’m burnt out again.

A mere ghost of my former self.

It’s funny. The main reason I started this project was to push myself to come up with new ideas every day. I had serious doubts about being able to make 365 days. After the first year I kept going because I enjoyed the process and the challenge. Today is day 689 and half of me is amazed that I’ve been able to keep coming up with shit. The other half s]is in constant fear that the well is dry.

Maybe I’ll have something tomorrow.

365 days

6-28-08

6-28-08

Day 687 of 365 More.

A few weeks back on the 365 Days Podcast, James did a tutorial raving about macro filters. A few weeks later Stephen picked some up and started shooting every tiny thing he could find. I finally got around to getting a set for myself today while Steph and I were out shopping and figured I hadto show them off. It’s been a while since I did any abstract kinda self-portrait, so I figured now would be a good chance.

I love hand shots. This brings a whole new essence to them.

365 days

6-23-08

6-23-08

Day 682 of 365 More.

Blah… you know some days I just can’t think of anything interesting to say. Basically I just didn’t really do much today. I worked. I came home. Watched some TV. Shot the podcast. Tried to get some rest. Really, its the same basic thing I do every day.

I really need to inject some excitement into my life.

365 days

6-19-08

6-19-08

Day 678 of 365 More.

Got a new 50mm lens. The world is good again.

Last year I dedicated a photo to Juneteenth. Sadly I was late doing it. I didn’t get around to doing the photo up til June 21st. Two days after Juneteenth. I considered it apropos as the entire point of Juneteenth is being late, but I vowed to make sure I did a commemorative Juneteenth photo on the right day this year.

For those of you who didn’t see last years photo, and are too lazy to click on the link, allow me to excerpt it and explain the meaning of Juneteenth:

The base idea of Juneteenth is that back on September 22, 1862, Abraham Lincoln announces that the civil war is over and that all slaves would be freemen effective the 1st of the year (you know, you can’t just end 200 years of slavery and oppression, you have to ween people off of it. Give Masa a chance for a few last beatings and rapes… and you know, the harvest was coming).

Two and a half years later, Union Soldiers by led by General Gordon Granger rode into to Texas and were surprised to find that, goshdarnit, there were still slaves there. Apparently "news hadn’t gotten that far." Of course, I’ve always felt that news had gotten that far and Whitey just decided that since the nigros couldn’t read, maybe if no one said anything out loud they’d never catch on. Anyway, on that day, the slaves were "freed" in Texas. Of course, General Granger advised them to continue doing the same work they were doing, living in the same houses they were living in and proceed exactly the same, you know… except now they would be getting paid (slaves wages). And thus slavery died and the ghetto was born.

I commemorate this joyous day by symbolically breaking free of my chains.

Yay! I’m free… And yet still poor… No 40 acres… No mule… hmmm… Can a nigga get a table dance?

So there you go. By the way, I have marked this pic flickr safe, even though technically I am naked. I figure, I’m a boy. I’m showing no naughty bits, it’s not even remotely sexual. Here’s hoping that I don’t get myself banned again. I’ve pretty much given up on explore. 🙂

Happy Juneteenth. Now how about that table dance?

365 days

6-16-08

6-16-08

Day 675 of 365 More.

*sigh*

So I hobbled up to the cigarette store after dinner to get some smokes (my knee is still screwed) and I looked up in the sky and the clouds were back lit in the absolute most beautiful way and I knew it had to be today’s self-portrait. So I hobbled back home and got my camera and my 50mm lens and tripod and then hobbled back up the hill to set up.

And then I kncked my tripod over!

*ARRRRGGGGHHHHH*

Luckily my camera is fine, hence me not just killing myself on the spot, but the casing to the 50 completely cracked open. It’s ruined.

On a good note, at least it was my cheapest lens. But as any photographer knows, the 50 is like the bread and butter. I’ve already ordered a new one.

*sigh*

365 days

6-10-08

6-10-08

Day 669 of 365 More.

In some ways I miss last year. This time last year I was unemployed and looking for work. Looking for work only takes so much time out of your week, so the rest of the time I spent working on photography and working out like I was in prison.

I was in great shape.

I’m not anymore. I’m fat and flabby and generally just not comfortable in my body. I spend most of my day at work and most of my evenings working on the comic strip or the podcast. It doesn’t leave a lot of time for anything else.

Don’t get me wrong, I love doing the podcast and Hellcats is a childhood dream come true. I mean, I’d be happier with both of them if I had more of an audience, but I’m hopeful that will happen.

I just don’t much like looking in the mirror or looking at pictures of me anymore.

So I took a break tonight and did some weight lifting. I don’t really feel like I look any better, but it’s a start. I need to work on the strip some more tonight, but if I can do that and still convince myself to get up early tomorrow, maybe I’ll put in 30 min. on the elliptical.

It’s time to bring sexy back one more time.

365 days

6-7-08

6-7-08

Day 666 of 365 More.

I wish I would have had the foresight to have started 365 Days two years and two days before I did so that my day 666 could have been on 6-6-06. Oh well.

I actually had intended to do something all devilish looking for this occasion, but I never got around to it. Besides, its 800 degrees outside. All I really want is to drink a margarita and cool off.

So I am.

Explore hates me. I really thought I was a shoe in with the VF cover from the other day. 51 comments, 19 faves. Far better than most of my pics have done lately. But I guess not. I guess I’m not as "interesting" as I thought. I haven’t made it in months. Oh well.

365 days

6-6-08

6-6-08

Day 665 of 365 More.

If I could only do one kind of picture in the 365 project it would be fake magazine covers. And if I was only allowed to fake one cover, over and over again, it would be this one.

Jameel ad I had the idea to do this cover with Steph way back when I did it the first time, and after yesterday’s virtual collaboration, I thought it might be nice to do an in person one as well.

So there you go. Steph’s a pimp.

And you think I’m bad.

365 days

6-2-08

6-2-08

Day 661 of 365 More.

This is a story of hope. A very short story because I am watching the game.

I’m not a huge hockey fan (not like football), but I do enjoy it. And when I watch, I root for the Pittsburgh Penguins. As I’ve mentioned in previous recent shots, the Pens are currently in the Stanley Cup Finals. And they haven’t been doing well. in a best of 7 series they are down 3 games to 1. Win or go home.

Tonight, they were down 3-2. The fans were singing victory songs in the final minute. Steph and I were on the edge of our seats just hoping and hoping.

With less than 35 seconds of regulation play, 35 seconds away from a world chamipionship, the Detroit Redwings gave up a goal.

At this very moment, we our now in overtime (took this shot during the break).

Keep hope alive!

365 days

5-29-08

5-29-08

Day 657 of 365 More.

So, like I said, I got fan art from Helder. It’s posted on the Cosmic Hellcats website so check it out.

Went to my weekly poker game tonight. I’ve been playing really well lately. In fact, tonight I’d say that I played better than anyone else. I had the chip lead pretty much the entire night. And then I lost it all in a series of bad breaks right at the end. So 3 hour of poker and nothing to show for it. *sigh* Somebody up there definitely hates me.

365 days

5-24-08

5-24-08

Day 652 of 365 More.

It’s a hockey night in Pittsburgh!

Tonight was the first day of the Stanley Cup championships. I’m not nearly as big a hocky fan as I am of football, but on a night like this, I have to support the team.

Fat lot of good it did us.

We got blown out 4-0. Luckily, its a long series, so hopefully we’ll get them next time.

Actually, I had kind of predicted the blow out. I’m in a pool at work for the cup. I predicted that the Pens would win the series in 6 games with a total score of 11 points. When Steph asked me how they were only going to have 11 points after 6 games, I told her they were going to get blown out in at least one game, and win another 1-0, so really its only about scoring 10 points in 3 games. Much more reasonable.

Also filmed the podcast today. In a total surprise, 2 min. into the show, Stephen introduced my mom. Apparently he was in the area, so they filmed the episode from her house. It was a total surprise to me, and pretty much the whole show is just about embarrassing me. Still, it was a fun time. I can’t wait to see how the final broadcast turns out.

GO PENS!

365 days

5-23-08

5-23-08

Day 651 of 365 More.

You know, I used to actually be good at this stuff. I really was. I was so good I even got into a pretty exclusive art school.

Of course, they ruined me.

*sigh*

I swear, I’m not fishing for compliments. This is not an attempt to make people come out of the woodwork saying "you are good." And its not an attempt to belittle anyone who thinks they don’t draw as well as me.

It’s just that I’m not happy with where my pencilling skills are right now. To be fair, I’m not the same person I was. The person I used to be drew every day for 11 years or so. The person I am today misses that and has been trying to recapture it for 3 days.

I guess I can’t expect magic over night.

I just don’t know if I can expect magic at all. The thing is, it just doesn’t work how it used to. The thing that makes me a good(i think) photographer is that I see the composition I want in my mind long before I ever actually snap the shot. I’ve always said, I’m not really a photographer. I’m an artist. I just draw with a camera now.

Drawing used to be the same way. I used to just see what I wanted in my mind and then it was a simple matter of tracing that image on the page. I still want to be able to do that, but the motor skill just aren’t there anymore.

I wonder if I’m doomed. I wonder if its just my lack of drive. I used to love drawing. If I was sitting in a class, listening to a lecture, and not paying attention, I’d look down at my notebook and find out that I had absentmindedly doodled the person sitting in front of me. That doesn’t happen anymore. Now I am pushing myself. And I’m not doing it out of love, I’m doing it out of regret. Trying to recapture I once had for the simple reason that I want to draw my own comic. There’s not even a good reason for that. I’m quite happy with the job Max is doing on Hellcats. And really, I have no real desire to take his reigns and do the daily art chores. But if we’re going to do this series of solo stories, I want to draw one of them.

Mostly just so I can say I did, I guess.

*sigh* I may never get there.

365 days

5-12-08

5-12-08

Day 640 of 365 More.

How do you become popular?

That probably sounds funny coming from me. By all rights, I am popular. The funny thing is, I don’t really know how I did it. A bunch of people started reading my blog because presumedly they find my random ranting and raving (ie. being myself) amusing. Even more people follow my flickr stream, presumedly because I’m not an awful photographer and I happen to take a lot of pictures of hot babes. And even more people joined 365 days because, I guess at heart we’re all egotistical narcissists. I wanted all of those things to become popular. But I don’t know that I really did anything, other than kinda build what I wanted to, and what I wanted happened to be the winning formula. Yay, go me.

But then we have my other projects. the 365 podcast gets maybe 200 people watching it every week. Which is nice. Really it is. Don’t get me wrong. But with the amount of work we (and especially Stephen) put into it, you’d kinda wish it was 10 times that. And Cosmic Hellcats is totally consuming my life these days (its why I’m up at 3am yet again) as well as Max’s life and by our estimate, we have MAYBE 50 people checking the site regularly. That’s it. Really, I don’t expect to be rich. It’d be nice. But really, I’m just looking for appreciated right now. It’s a hell of a lot of work for just amusing 50 people. Likely 50 people who are already amused by my blog or 365 anyway.

So what am I missing? How do I pimp the site? We don’t really want to spend money on advertising, per se (at least not yet). But I’d love it if I was sure there was a word of mouth thing going on. But I don’t know how to get that started. Honestly, I don’t really know for sure that anyone is following the storyline at all.

Are you? Does anyone really care or are we just annoying people? And if you like it, have you recommended it to other people?’

What about the podcast? Same thing.

Speaking of the podcast, the reason I look all grainy and gritty here is because the mini-challenge this week is to do textured photos. Here is mine. The texture was taken with a 300mm macro lens. It’s the side of my neighbors stone staircase to his porch. The portrait was taken in my studio.

So anyway… help me out. How do I become popular so I can take over the world?

365 days

5-7-08

Day 635 of 365 More. I am such an attention whore. The Half Show asked me to be the guest on their broadcast for this week, and since I am all about shameless self-promotion, of course I agreed. Show went pretty good. After so many weeks of doing the 365 Days Podcast, it’s interesting to…

5-2-08

Day 630 of 365 More. I was looking at my pics from the last month or so and I realized it had been a while since I was in explore. And looking closer, I realized it honestly had been a while since I deserved to be. Ever since starting the comic, I’ve kinda let anything…