A funny thing happened to me the other day. I stopped by Phantom of the Attic, my local comic book store, on my way to campus (as I do every Wednesday). After getting my comics, I went across the street and got Subway for lunch and then I walked back to my car so i could go…
Day 688 of 365 More.
How much is petrol? 82 million a gallon? Fuck this machine!
I’ve been looking for a new car. For those who don’t know, I drive a 97 Blazer. To be generous, one might say its on its last leg. I have a oil leak problem that no one can figure out. I broke off my passenger side mirror. I’ve had problems with everything from the fuel pump to the transmission. It’s old and it sucks. Also, it get like negative 83 miles to the gallon. And that’s a real problem these days, seeing as how putting twenty dollars in your tank can only almost get you to the next gas station.
Spent this weekend looking at hybrid SUVs. Now I don’t want to hear anyone’s nonsense telling me to get a nice little practical smart car or any shit like that. 1) I am a photographer. I routinely carry a huge amount of equipment and models with me on random trips, and I need the space. 2) I live in Pittsburgh. At the top of a hill. Really, in the 11 months out of the year when we have 18 feet of snow on the ground, one really wants four wheel drive.
Anyway, I’ve recently decided that for my lifestyle the Ford Escape is the perfect vehicle for me. It doesn’t have quite the luggage capacity of my Blazer, but it’s good enough, not to mention, nice and comfy and gets better than twice the gas milage I get right now. I might even be able to drive to the corner store and back for less than $47.
The problem is, a brand new one is like $30,000. Problem number two is that I don’t have $30,000. I’ve never actually owned a new car in my life. It just always seemed kinda silly. What with the "you lose $3000 just driving off the lot" and all. I’ve always been perfectly happy with used cars. The problem is motherfuckers who bought the Ford Escape Hybrid in the last 3 years (the came out in 2005) haven’t traded them back in yet. They’re hard as hell to find, and even when I do, the cheapest I’ve seen is like $19,000. Most people still want like $25000+ for them, and at that rate, I might as well have Ford custom build me one that’s decked out and pefect for like $32,000.
Fuck I hate life. I remember like in 1998 when I was driving a Cavalier Z24 and and less than a dollar a gallon, 20 bucks would fill up my tank and leave me more than enough change for a (much cheaper) pack of smokes and maybe a candy bar or something.
I blame freedom. In a world where I am ruler we would not have these problems. Again, I implore you citizens, in the polls this fall, vote for me. Not just as president, but as sovereign lord of all I survey. We tried the little democracy thing. Gave it over 230 years. Let’s face it. It just isn’t working out. Chalk it up to a lesson learned and appoint me as ruler and I promise a utopian society beyond you’re wildest dreams.
Or at the very least, I promise that you’ll fucking be able to fill up your tank for twenty dollars.
No, well, at the very least could you all pass the hat around and get me some scratch to buy a new vehicle? I swear, $30,000 and I’ll never ask for another thing again.
I’m worth it, right?
Day 672 of 365 More.
Brother can you spare a dime!!!!!
You know it’s crazy. I don’t do anything but work anymore. I guess it’s been like that for a while now, but I’m just starting to have it sink in.
I have so many extra projects, I can’t keep up with extra projects. 365s get posted after 4 in the morning. I keep falling behind on answering comments. I’m really behind on commenting on other people’s stuff. I started working on a tarot card like four days ago and haven’t gotten back to it. I haven’t had time to draw or edit my most recent photoshoot.
I’m just burnt out.
This will be so much easier when I become so famous that I don’t have to work a real job. But for being at work for 8+ hours a day, I’d really have a pretty good life.
As it is, I have no life anymore. It’s June. I should be well into planning Jammy Jam by now. I got nothing. No bands. No prizes. Last year we were actually talking about maybe trying to find some venue other than my house for this years jam, and yet I haven’t even been looking at outfits for myself. Anyone want a job being my Jammy Jam coordinator? My last one moved to Hawaii.
I’ve spent most of my time since I got home from work reorganizing the Hellcats site so that it can better display ads. Ewww, banner ads, my god have I sold out. But if I want to seriously be a writer/artist/whatever, I guess I have to make money some way. And I’m really happy about the Project: Wonderfiul business plan. They actually gaver us a serious boost in views today. Let’s hope it continues.
Day 667 of 365 More.
So here’s something a little different. I took this picture today, but its actually representative of what I did on Friday. Today, I didn’t really do anything superinteresting. I shot the podcast with Stephen. worked on Hellcats, which will be up at midnight, and worked on cleaning my pool.
I wish I had done the pool a week ago. It’s been in the 90s here the last few days and it would have been really nice to jump in. But no dice. Another day or two of chemical balancing and it will be set though.
Anyway, nothing I felt like taking a picture of, so instead I thought I’d talk about one of my favorite activities. BARE-AOKE! I’ve mentioned it here before. It’s Karaoke, at a strip club! One of the best things ever. It’s just like Karaoke anywhere else, a bunch of drunken losers, standing on stage, belting out out of tune renditions of pop and rock songs, with no cohesive style between them, so even if someone is good, which they’re usually not, you’re left wondering why "My Way" was followed by "Baby Got Back". But, to make it more tolerable, at this club, there are naked ladies dancing around you while you sing. It’s the best thing ever. Even if you don’t like strip clubs. It’s just so ridiculous and surreal that you can’t help but love it. Plus the deejay, DJ Marty, is just awesome.
Friday they were celebrating one of my favorite strippers’, Pinky’s, birthday. So I ended up singing her favorite song of mine, Prince’s Darling Nikki to her while she danced for me. Actually everyone loves when I do Darling Nikki. It’s my best karaoke performance. I got a standing ovation, and won myself a couple free passes from the bartender/manager, just because she liked it.
So you know, if anyone wants to go sing in front of some strippers one of these Friday nights, I’m in.
It’s been a couple days since I added new pics of Amaya and Sarah and their lapdance shoot. Felt like I definitely couldn’t wait any longer. So here’s some more.
And there’s still even more to come. You lucky people.
When I was trying to come up with an idea to shoot Amaya and Sarah together, I had a flash of the old Aerosmith Crazy video. Everything took off from there.
More to come…
When I was trying to come up with an idea to shoot Amaya and Sarah together, I had a flash of the old Aerosmith Crazy video. Everything took off from there.
More to come…
Day 264 of 365 days. There’s a lot that goes into this whole being a drifter thing. It’s not just banging farmers daughters and saving the world from alien invasions. You also need to make some money. Sure, you can get decent room and board by shoveling horse manure or stacking hay, but that just…