Today’s wistful career change decision: male stripper. Magic Mav. Which one of you ladies wants to break the law?

Today’s Wistful Career Change Decision: Breakfast Cereal Mascot. Whenever a kid tries to steal Maveeos, I stab him in the eye with a spoon!

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision:IceHouse Fisher. Cuz its hot as fuck! Someone remind me of this when I bitch about cold this winter.

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision: Professional Wingman! Helping others get laid since 1974. I also want to fliy airplanes.

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision: Sith Lord. Given the disorganization of the Rebels, I can think if 1000 ways I could have beat them.

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision:warrior w/ a magic sword joined by my friends a mok & a princess making our my through a strange world

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision: Proprietor Hotel California. No, you can’t have your wine. We haven’t had that spirit here since 1969

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision:Latenight talkshow host. I’m up anyway. I need a gimmick. Like dog barking or that golf swing. Ideas?

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision:Energizer Bunny. They say its tough in Hollywood these days. But, 24 years & that bitch keeps working!

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision: President and Vampire Hunter. That or maybe a lion in Madagascar 4.

Todays Wistful Career Change Decision:Clinical Psychologist. Office visits are only $100 & I can fix any mental issue with this here mallet!

Today’s Wistful Career Change Decision: Hipster Biker Gang Leader. Like the Hell’s Angel. But on Schwinns!

Today’s Wistful Career Change Decision: Tarzan! Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhahahahaaaaahhhh!!!!

Today’s Wistful Career Change Decision: Hip-Hop Hype Man. YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH BOYEEEEE!!!!!!!

Today’s Wistful Career Change Decision: Miss USA. If they’re gonna fix the pageant. Why not fix it for me? I mean, look at these legs!